February 2010
2 posts
.......
Me: Give me your JID number, please.
Juror: I don't have on of those. Can you look it up another way?
Me: You have your summons right?
Juror: Yes.
Me: Ok, look at your badge. Your JID number is at the top, underneath a bar code. See it?
Juror: No, I just see J-I-D in parenthesis.
Ahem
Me: Good morning, Jury Services. How can I help you?
Juror: I need to request an excuse.
Me: Ok, sir-
Juror: This is a lady!
(Silence)
Juror: Hello? Are you still there?
Me: Yes sir! Uh, M'am. So sorry s-, uh M'am.
January 2010
1 post
“Juror’s name.. Juror’s name? Is that my name?”
– Juror registering for service
November 2009
2 posts
WTW????
Me: Make sure you call each night the week you are scheduled, after 6 pm.
Juror: Ok........ Do I have to call everyday?
“My mother can’t do jury service because she is illiterate and she...”
– Juror requesting an excuse for their mother.
October 2009
2 posts
RSVP?
Me: Good morning, Jury Services.
Juror: Um, I was just callin' to let you know that I'm declining my jury service.
Me: (choking back laughter) I'm afraid that isn't an option.
Juror: What? Why the fuck not?
Me: Oh boy!
Juror: Excuse me!
Me: You received a jury summons, not an invitation. The Court, a branch of government, isn't asking you to report. They're telling you to report.
Juror: Well....... I'm NOT COMING.
Me: Okay. Are you aware of the $1500.00 fine?
Juror: No!
(Silence)
Me: Was there anything else I could help you with today?
Juror: That's it?
Me: If we're not registering you for jury service, there isn't anything else to discuss.
Juror: Fuck!
(and the line goes dead)
FAQ
Me: Good afternoon, Jury Services.
Juror: I had a question about my summons?
Me: Okay.....
Juror: Hello?
Me: Yeah, still here.
Juror: Oh! Am I supposed to write the reason for my excuse in the section marked 'explain your excuse request'?
September 2009
1 post
MI
Me: Good morning, jury services.
Juror: Morning....
Me: Yes sir... How can I help you today?
Juror: Well, I took my form to my doctor to request an excuse.
Me: And?????
Juror: Well, none of them at the office could figure out what MI was for.
Me: I'm sorry?
Juror: What does 'MI' mean?
Me: Are you referring to the medical excuse section of the summons? There's no 'MI...'
Juror: No, it's on the same line as 'name', right next to it, there is 'MI'? We didn't know how to fill that part out. Nobody at the doctor's knew what went there.
Me: 'MI' next to 'name'? Sir......
Juror: Yes?
Me: 'MI' stands for 'middle initial'.
Juror: Huh?
Me: MI is for. your. middle. initial.
Silence
Me: Sir?
Juror: Oh.............. Okay, thanks. 'Cause they couldn't figure it out.
Me: No problem, sir.
(Looking back, I probably should have asked what his doctor's name was.....)
August 2009
2 posts
The following is a letter from a juror to Superior...
To Whom it May Concern:
I have lived in Las Vegas Nevada for the last 5 years. But, if I have to report for service, I’m requesting that the court provide the following”
First class round trip air plane ticktes
Five star hotel accommodations
Chauffered limousine to and from my hotel
Daily meals of BBQ ribs, potato salad, Pepsi, and for dessert peach cobbler
I would also like it...
Me: Good morning, jury services.
Juror: I need to be excused.
Me: Ok, why?
Juror: I have to go to work!I have to take my kids to school!
Me: Everyone works. The court isn't going to excuse you because you work.
Juror: Well, is the court going to feed my family? If I don't work I don't get paid!
Me: Ma'm...
Juror: Well, could you at least send me to a court that's closer to my house? And what about my kids? How am I supposed to find a babysitter at the last minute.
Me: Ma'm you received your summons 6 weeks ago.
Silence
Me: Ma'm?
Juror: Well, can you schedule me on the Furlough day?
June 2009
3 posts
Call Center, yesterday @ 3:00 pm, duration 4...
Juror: I'm having trouble with my summons. You didn't send a return envelope.
Me: You don't need an envelope. You're scheduled for next week.
Juror: But it says to fill it out and return it.
Me: No, you would only do that if you weren't serving, like if you were requesting an excuse.
Juror: It reads, 'do not detach and complete if you are serving. Bring this form to the courthouse.'
Me: Exactly. Understand?
Juror: I understand that you owe me an envelope.
“Good morning, my name is B—-. I am the father of my son, J—. I...”
– Juror call center, yesterday @ 9:15 am.
Today, Impanelment 8:15 am
Impanelment was busy, busy, busy today. On my way to make copies of postponement forms, I heard this snatch of conversation:
Juror: I wouldn’t be a good juror. I can’t be impartial. So this is a waste of time for me to even be here.
Staff: Hmmmm…. Well, that-
Juror interrupts
Juror: I hate everybody! Especially blacks. Really!
I walk by hurriedly, trying to avoid...
May 2009
4 posts
5/29/09 8:30am Duration: 8 minutes (felt like 30)
Me: Good-
Juror: I don't know what side of stupid you people are on, but I cannot serve.
Me: Ahem... Good morning, jury services. How can I help you?
Juror: You're helping me, NOT!!!
Me: Ok..... Tell me why you called today?
Juror: This is harassment, and I'm not going to put up with it. There are plenty of unemployed or really old people. Ask them to serve!
Me: M'am, jury service is the responsibility of every citizen.
Juror: Just quit calling me. Lose my number!
Silence
Juror: Hello?
Me: But you called me....
And.... dial tone
5/26/09, 9:30am, Impanelment
You know the bratty, whiny, snotty nosed kid in the candy aisle at the grocery store who pitches a fit when mommy or daddy won’t buy them a lollipop? Well, fast forward 20 years and you have an idea of the lady I interviewed. She wanted to be excused because she worked. (Insert crickets)
I explained that people who worked weren’t exempt from jury duty. She reiterated in a voice...
Thursday, 2:30 pm, Duration: 2 minutes
Me: Good afternoon, jury services.
Juror: I need to request an excuse.
Me: ..... Because????
Juror: I don't speak english.
Call Center/5-4-09 @ 2:00 pm Duration: 10 minutes
Me: Good afternoon, jury services.
Juror: I ain't doing jury duty. It would be a serious financial burden. My job doesn't pay me for jury duty.
Me: Unfortunately, the court doesn't excuse people for that reason.
Juror: WHAT? Are you going to pay my bills?
Me: Uh..... No, m'am?
Juror: Well! What am I supposed to do?
Me: You could apply for financial hardship.
Them: How do I do that?
Me: Complete the requested information in the 'financial hardship request' section and return the form.
SILENCE
Me: M'am?
Juror: Well, it's asking for the amount of people in the household. What is that?
Me: Uh.... They are asking you to list the amount of people that live in your house.
Juror: Well, I don't live in a house. I live in an apartment.
SILENCE
Juror: Hello?
Me: In this case, the two are synonymous.
Juror: So what do people who live in apartments do?